Oh Ha Ni’s diary 10/5/10

Well, we basically know what Hani thinks and feels throughout the drama but it is great to see how Hani feels really deep inside. I was moved by her diary. Her love...I still remember when she said to Eun Jo that "If two people mutually like each other, it is a miracle." Oh Hani. If only you knew...

Thanks again to jiners for the translation!


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[Trans] Oh Ha Ni’s diary 10/5/10
Korean to English translation by jiners @ Naughty Kiss Thread @ Soompi

A Morning without seung Jo.

The morning shining sun is your face.

Hey Seung Jo.

I was always so happy with our mornings spent together..

The three of us playing around and racing each other to shower first.

The electricity that went through my whole body when our feet just happened to touch under the dining table.

Now that your gone everything seems like nothing.

I put effort and tamed my heart.

I, oh ha ni will let you baek seung jo go.

It seems like you have gone to where I cant hold on so before it hurts anymore I will let go of your hand..

My fallen heart doesn’t know. But I will put effort and pretend that I don’t know.

“No! I’ve forgotten seung jo. Baek seung jo has nothing to do with me.”

I’m not saying it to you.

It’s the sound of my holding my heart/feelings back.

I feel like loving you may hurt too much so I’m running away.

To a place I cant find my heart/ feelings…

Although right now no matter how much effort I put in to forget you. The memory of that one day keeps bursting out and it still hurts…

The night I came out in early fall, and the sound of my heart running while you were holding me. Also the sound of your heart beating.. the sound of crickets chirping, the stars in the sky were all exceptionally beautiful…

Still I want to forget.

The drunk me was happy while getting piggy backed against your back. Even if you teased me for having a small chest.

I want all the memories of being with you to be forgotten into a black hole. But wherever I am memories of you keep popping into my mind. Will I be able to forget you like this??

The night that will always be for sure in my heart.

the breath coming from your lips.

Your lips so soft and hot.

As if I drank alcohol I’m dizzy.

My first kiss…

Now I want to hide it all

The one next to you is a much better person than I am. Because she is a person that is similar to you.

A person like me…

A peson like me…

I want to quit now.

Before my love becomes more painful.

But why am I like this.

Although I tried and tried to put so much effort.

I love being taught tennis.

Even though I know all you want is to win.

One, two, three.

One, two, Three.

I wish the racquet we are holding together was your heart/feelings.

Being in your arms, I wish I was your heart/ feelings.

Hey seung jo.

What to do.

Forgetting you is this hard.

I think I may just have to like you.

As training gets harder

You are entering my heart.

Suddenly you are getting louder and sitting there without knowing I’m there.

What to do…

What am I to do…

What am I seriously to do.

Dummy…

Although I tried so hard to eat my feelings and forget you the thought of being with you for 2 nights and 3 days makes my heart race.

Even though I’m miserable and struggling like this. squeezing a rock, pulling out a small grass is too strong. (this part was confusing for me sorry…basically forgetting seunjo is hard haha)

My poor love you cant even listen to my voice.

My poor love who can’t even protest.

Cant forget or throw away. (shes referring to her love “for” seungjo.”

You are doing something for me again.

No matter how unfriendly you are you have always listened to my requests.

Your kindness is always saving me.

What to do.

Again I am turning the path I should go.

Even though I know I’ll regret it.

I cant accept. Even though I know my heart will break into many pieces.

I am once again, standing behind you.

“I like you! What about you?”

Yoon ha era.

So secure and strong. I see how easily you can show seung jo your heart/feelings.

Its so hard for me.

Waiting for seung jo’s reply.

You are…

Baek seung jo smiled…

“Good Job.” He says

yes. He said those words.

With you I ran, rolled and haven’t slept for a couple days. It was so tiresome. But just hearing those words make it all worth it.

It means I will never forget this time.

The meaning of this sweat.

The blue waves are pushing away

In my heart birds are flying once again…

“Now?”

Are you worrying for me?

Baekseung jo for oh ha ni?

You couldn’t even get your revenge because of me.

Even the frosty voice of you saying this is the first time you have ever lost is still ringing in my ear. So that’s why I said I would help you win. I gritted my teeth and endured the hell like training. Im so sad because I couldn’t see it till the end. You let me on your back without saying a word.

Thank you.

Sorry.

Its warm…

It really hurts.

And I’m miserable…

Next to you another person is…

The time of yours that I wanted…

The sound of your laugh that I wanted to see…

The hand of yours I wanted to hold…

Its hurts and hurts and hurts again…

Slowly, slowly, slowly.

My ripped out heart with my decaying/rotting/ getting old love